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Alone
Oct 30, 2005 23:39:09 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Oct 30, 2005 23:39:09 GMT -5
Toorima, you could use me. Kiba said, as he settled around her, curling around protectivly (sp?). You know, like, a scapegoat type thing. So the pack doesn't know he did it too you. I don't mind. After you tell them I did it, you can banish me or something, or have me killed or something, all so the pack doesn't hate you. Kiba whispered, his voice shakey as if not really wanting to do this, but would for Toorima.
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Alone
Nov 1, 2005 1:19:25 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 1, 2005 1:19:25 GMT -5
Toorima listened to Kiba quietly, eyes half-lidded and head barely held up. Honestly, she had thought about something similar to what he said, but stopped, realizing that it was really low of her to use one of her cadre members like that, even lower than she already was. She probably wouldn't be able to live with herself if she did this. Really, he must've really cared for her to offer himself up like this, either that or really felt sorry for her and her mistakes. Ugh.
The vixen shifted her paws around restlessly before speaking. "I don't think I could ever do that to one of my packmembers, its bad enough I've got you all fighting and dying for my cause, my battle. I'm the one who screwed this up, I guess I'll find somehow to deal with it." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "I'm just not entirely sure how I'm going to do that yet." And with that, she stuck a paw over her snout, doing all in her power to not tear open Cadmus' wounds.
Really, she wanted to say more, tell Kiba who appreciative she was of him to offer himself up like that. Well, if she got around the whole 'pack thinking she was a failure and nothing but a slut' part, all that was left was raising these pups. She could manage that one on her own right? Eee.
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Kiba
Been Here a While
Subordinate
Tears are only Products of Fear and Sorrow that Leak from the Tearduct
Posts: 121
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Alone
Nov 1, 2005 21:38:27 GMT -5
Post by Kiba on Nov 1, 2005 21:38:27 GMT -5
Kiba's auds perked, and he listened intently. I don't think I could ever do that to one of my packmembers, its bad enough I've got you all fighting and dying for my cause, my battle. I'm the one who screwed this up, I guess I'll find somehow to deal with it. Kiba felt as if a dagger had periced right through his heart. Toorima, if the most of Gauridian Forest (Sp?) pack has been involved, then hell, we are too. We will always fight for you, for our loyalty comes before anything...but...you alone can't fight a battle, if their whole pack in fighting, for then we risk your death...and from the Heart, Toorima, if you were to die, I wouldn't know what to do... I'd give my life for you, always. He whispered, and his auds pinned. Because you do know I love you, and if it's too much to handle right now for you, just ask and I could do anything to take some weight off your shoulders. He added, almost regretting he had said that.
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Alone
Nov 2, 2005 1:29:48 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 2, 2005 1:29:48 GMT -5
Slowly, Toorima moved her paws from her snout, although the vixen still felt like coiling into a ball and not ever coming out. "Toorima, if the most of Guardian Forest pack has been involved, then hell, we are too. We will always fight for you, for our loyalty comes before anything...but...you alone can't fight a battle, if their whole pack in fighting, for then we risk your death...and from the Heart, Toorima, if you were to die, I wouldn't know what to do... I'd give my life for you, always" She sighed a little. What he said was all true, it had become a pack against pack battle. But, wolves of the Guardian Forests had been told of why there was such a hatred between the packs. She hadn't ever told anyone the epics of why this is like it is. Maybe that was why she felt bad about it.
"Because you do know I love you, and if it's too much to handle right now for you, just ask and I could do anything to take some weight off your shoulders." Toorima looked over at him, a bit unsure of what to say to that. "I don't know. Hopefully, if the pack really is that loyal, they should be semi-understanding. Maybe I could just not tell if they don't ask. No, that's probably not the best idea, there is already too much I don't tell..." She was thinking aloud, rambling about whatever came to mind. Thinking aloud usually resulted in her spouting stupid things. "I think I can manage for the most part, I'll just have to work on rearing the whelps and making sure they don't grow up and kill us all. That's really the only part I'm concerned about, being as that I couldn't even raise my last pup. This really isn't relevant or important but, these, would they be considered Sangra or Yomenimo...-shit"
She quickly shut herself up, having realized that she'd been rambling in a daze like state. She had almost sputtered something that she'd worked to hide away from everyone now. "Sorry, I'm just stressed and I ramble incoherent shit when I am apparantly..." she scoffed, feeling like an idiot. Well, that had been charming, now she'd probably confused the poor male and made him wonder what other secrets she was stashing away.
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Alone
Nov 2, 2005 21:16:12 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Nov 2, 2005 21:16:12 GMT -5
OoC ~ Dude, WTF??!!!?!?!?! I posted and it went.. POOF DAMNIT! -snarls and attacks computer-
BiC ~ Kiba co.cked his crainia, and his right aud fell slightly, dropping over as his head leaned down to the right. She's had pups before?! He thought, and he almost put those to words. Well, I could help...that is, if you want...you know... he paused, and looked down to his paws, goldden orbs were clouded with pain, for it troubled him to sya his next words. I could help you raise the pups, and have them think I am their fath- he paused, and took a deep breath. -er...so they think a light brute, not the evil shit he was... he mumbled, and looked towards the end of the cave. Make them think I was their father...what the hell are you thinking, stupid? he scolded himself, but in such a muffled and mumbled voice that none of the others could hear.
His auds flattened as he turned back to Toorima. S-Sorry... he muttered, and rested his crainia on his paws, as if sorry and filled with guilt for saying that. Stupid ass, she'll never agree with you, you...dumb bastard...That was so rude!!! He snarled to himself, maing himself feel bad, yet comntent.
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Alone
Nov 3, 2005 1:06:58 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 3, 2005 1:06:58 GMT -5
I think proboards is getting hungry again 'cause its starting to get bad about eating posts >> *thwacks it*
Toorima still felt really stupid, sputtering words out all over the place like that. She had done that before just not that bad. There were a few things, a few secrets she'd be quite content with taking to her grave, and if she kept this up, she'd be telling them all without realizing it. Augh. "Well, I could help...that is, if you want...you know..." She sat silent for a few more moments. "I guess that wouldn't hurt..." the Alphess said quietly, gazing at her paws. She knew there were a few wolves around here she would be able to count on if the need arose. Kiba was one, Rhapsody was another, Kyler and Akia were friendly enough..there were options of course.
"I could help you raise the pups, and have them think I am their fath-" Eyes moved up to him while he paused, but immediately retreated back to her feet. "er...so they think a light brute, not the evil shit he was..." That could also be a plan. Either way, she didn't intend on explaining to them that their father was a raping bastard right away. Maybe if she crammed enough other 'father figures' into their lives, they wouldn't wonder. That was thinking completely positive. To this, she didn't reply verbally, instead, thought over possible scenarios in her head.
As he mumbled something the vixen couldn't understand, she remained silent. "I think I'm just scared and so pissed off I don't even know what to do with myself." she whispered extremely quietly. Fear. That was something she didn't admit to everyday, she was much to headstrong to do such a thing, but this was obviously a special occasion...
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Alone
Nov 3, 2005 10:52:24 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Nov 3, 2005 10:52:24 GMT -5
A lizzard scurried past them, and then wriggled into a crack in the cave. Kiba's auds shot forwards, and his golden orbs wfollowed the little animal intently. But as it dissapeared into the crack, Kiba's auds lay flat again, and his orbs grew pale once more. "I think I'm just scared and so pissed off I don't even know what to do with myself." His left aud perked up some, to catch what she had said. No need to be scared anymore, Toorima. I'm here...we're all here to help you. He said, referring to the pack. And you can talk to me, ya'know. My ears take in all you say, but my mouth never releases it.
He looked towards the enterance, were the femora that had talked to him once, lay. He then looked towrards his paws again. If there's anything you need to talk about, or something, you can talk to me. Be as open as you wish, or as closed and secret as you want. He muttered, then lifted his gaze to rest on her.
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rei
Member of Yamamori
Rei; Devil Sent
Posts: 33
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Alone
Nov 3, 2005 14:51:32 GMT -5
Post by rei on Nov 3, 2005 14:51:32 GMT -5
Ooc;; Lets just say Rei left. >.>;; I can make a post real fast, if you want me to. Just because you two are in a lookingly important part in the roleplay. ;D
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Alone
Nov 3, 2005 15:50:19 GMT -5
Post by Sinistra on Nov 3, 2005 15:50:19 GMT -5
OOC: Now now, Kiba, let's not get too friendly... Or Rhappie will eat you. 0.0 Jeez how many times have I said that? *toddles away to count*
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Alone
Nov 4, 2005 0:59:12 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 4, 2005 0:59:12 GMT -5
*cackles* tension =O Don't worry 'bout it Rei, leaving posts are agonizing >>; or maybe its just me but nevermind X3
No need to be scared anymore, Toorima. I'm here...we're all here to help you. She listened, but partially shrugged, nodding very slowly. She knew they were here, it was just getting her to go talk to them that was murder. It was really just her nature, having grown up in a land of reckless savages where no one gave a damn about how you felt or anything, just as long as you were alive and able to fight. Really, it was a personal thing too. She had convinced herself of her headstrong nature and now it was bad when it came to situations such as this one. Bleh. And you can talk to me, ya'know. My ears take in all you say, but my mouth never releases it."
Toorima remained silent. There was a lot of things she should say..but wouldn't. Stubborn. It was bad enough it felt like her weaknesses were being exposed. If there's anything you need to talk about, or something, you can talk to me. Be as open as you wish, or as closed and secret as you want. Secret. Yeah, that sounded better but in all reality, it wasn't the best. Eyes watched her paws still, knowing she should atleast tell Kiba something. The whole epic of a story wasn't needed, but at least a little would be all right. It wasn't like it was going to kill her or anything.
Heaving a rough sigh. "I guess I just don't want a repeat of last time. I got sick and I had Orin breathing down my neck. Only one pup was alive and I couldn't even raise her. This time, I know Dhjeron won't be giving a damn but I just don't want him around." she said, stopping rather short, that only being the surface of things. After that, the femme grumbled something, setting her head on her paws yet again. Rar.
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Alone
Nov 4, 2005 22:51:54 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Nov 4, 2005 22:51:54 GMT -5
"I guess I just don't want a repeat of last time. I got sick and I had Orin breathing down my neck. Only one pup was alive and I couldn't even raise her. This time, I know Dhjeron won't be giving a damn but I just don't want him around." Kiba's auds flickered forward a breif moment, before laying back down. We could hide, er, well we could hide you somewhere Dhjeron can't find you. We, as the pack, could act terrified and worried as if you've gone missing...no no that won't work... Kiba grumbled. He could use that as an advantage... He shook his head, and looked up towards the ceiling cave. We could increase patrolls, to scout the border of any trace of him when birthing is near, or something... he suggested. He was throwing out random ideas, and didn't know what he was saying some of the time.
If only there were a way to help you, only if there were a way...then the pack could be happy, and not care about who fathered the pups... Suddenly, a though came to him. Ooorrr, if we have enough time, you could find an alphen and say the pups are his...but, that's up to your choice...I don't want to rush you on things like this, Toorima, he muttered, and looked away ashamed. Rhappie...that damn brute. I'll give Toorima this idea, and she'll go out and choose him. Damn, I knew something like this would happen...I would find the love of my life, and she'll go off and pluck out another brute to father pups that aren't his...If she does pick him... here he stopped thinking, and accedently put his thoughts to words. I hope he treats the pups as I would, like a true father would. Raise them nice, so they would never know or have any hint of who there true father was...
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Alone
Nov 5, 2005 2:42:22 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 5, 2005 2:42:22 GMT -5
"We could hide, er, well we could hide you somewhere Dhjeron can't find you. We, as the pack, could act terrified and worried as if you've gone missing...no no that won't work..." she listened, staying silent. Kiba seemed to stop short but then, she realized they were probably thinking the exact same thing. If Dhjeron got word of the pack being on edge, he'd show up and massacre or do something murderous to them. "I hid last time..sort of anyway. It wasn't really my cup of tea..." the femme uttered quietly. When she was finally able to leave the den again after that, she had a whole mess and a half to clean up. A repeat of that wasn't something she was looking forward too. "We could increase patrolls, to scout the border of any trace of him when birthing is near, or something..." This was something she'd considered. "Yeah, I plan to have Akki get some warriors and set them all on high alert, make sure everything is secure around here..." After that, she was silent for a while, considering all the various options, their outcomes, their pros and cons, everything...
"Ooorrr, if we have enough time, you could find an alphen and say the pups are his...but, that's up to your choice...I don't want to rush you on things like this, Toorima," Eh, this was something she wasn't looking forward too. Alphen. She didn't really enjoy having most of the responsibility to herself, but didn't need a real 'mate' right now. This comment she didn't respond. Anyway, what exactly was she supposed to say anyway? Mrr. "I hope he treats the pups as I would, like a true father would. Raise them nice, so they would never know or have any hint of who there true father was..." What was he talking about? She thought for a moment..Rhapsody. Slowly, Toorima shook her head. Any thought of chosing an Alphen made her die on the inside. Just..not right now.
"Maybe this won't be as bad as I once thought...I guess I'll just take things as they come. Nothing I can really do to change anything now.." she huffed, falling silent afterwords. Commenting on the Alphen deal wasn't needed. Mrr...
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Alone
Nov 7, 2005 19:28:59 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Nov 7, 2005 19:28:59 GMT -5
Kiba lifted his head slightly, to peer out towards the wilderness outside. The rays of the sun were begining to fade slowly, and thus he new the day was coming to an end, but sunset was a bit a ways yet. "I hid last time..sort of anyway. It wasn't really my cup of tea..." His head turned back to her, and his auds flickered forward. "Yeah, I plan to have Akki get some warriors and set them all on high alert, make sure everything is secure around here..." Yes, that would be a good idea. Kiba was oddely silent, for his talking self... "Maybe this won't be as bad as I once thought...I guess I'll just take things as they come. Nothing I can really do to change anything now.." Kiba nodded. Yes, yes that's true. You can't change the past, or the present, but you can try and shape the future to mold a better outcome... he muttered, and looked towards the back of the cave. And the Alphen doesn't need to be your mate, just somebody you would enjoy sharing your life with, you know, to be happy. But with these things comes choosing the right person, and all... He said, his voice seemed faint, as if he wasn't really there.
He thought a moment. Well, maybe something good will happen. Maybe the pups, when they're born, maybe they'll like their father, er, their 'adopted' father, now Dhjeron. Though, it's always nice to have interesting little puffballs tumbling around the packlands... He shook his head, and turned back to Toorima. Toorima, you know I'd... he stopped. He couldn't bring himself to say it. I'd treat the pups better than Rhapsody, be a better father, a better Alphen... but he qoulnd't say this, not to Toorima, not now. This was his opinion, and maybe Rhapsody was better at him at these things, and maybe not.
Kiba sighed. He was not heartbroken, but his heart was exhausted. His past loved one had died, and now he had just recovered from Toorima being 'dead'. Though the was alive, she had so much to do and worry about. If only there was a way to help you get some weight off your shoulders, Toorima... he thought, and his auds rested 'pon his crainia. If only there was a way to help... he mutterd soflty, mostly to himself, He didn't know if Toorima or the others had heard it, but he didn't care. He didn't even know he had said it aloud.
OoC ~ Brain Dead, but I tried ...
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Alone
Nov 7, 2005 19:31:33 GMT -5
Post by Kibeh on Nov 7, 2005 19:31:33 GMT -5
Er, where it says: er, their 'adopted' father, now Dhjeron. heh... now should be NOT!!! ><;;;
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Alone
Nov 8, 2005 22:47:46 GMT -5
Post by Toorima on Nov 8, 2005 22:47:46 GMT -5
Bah >>; I'd kinda like to finish this thread up so I can speed things up a bit, RPing angst!Toorima gets old after a while and this is only the start...plus we needta do the hunt deal and all sorts of other shiznit *asplodes*
She looked over at him, watching him stare out the entrance of the cave. The day was slipping away, time going quicker than she'd earlier thought. Guess that was a good thing, she was going to be quite happy when this day was over and done. Still, it would've been better had it not happened at all. "Yes, yes that's true. You can't change the past, or the present, but you can try and shape the future to mold a better outcome..." Toorima nodded, the future was all she sort of had to look forward too. It was the last stands of possible hope.
"And the Alphen doesn't need to be your mate, just somebody you would enjoy sharing your life with, you know, to be happy. But with these things comes choosing the right person, and all." Choosing. That was where things got difficult. She enjoyed both Kiba and Rhapsody's company, and before his death, Toukon was on the list. Both those males were helping (at least trying) to aid her in cleaning up her mess. Hell, Kiba had sat here with her and offered many suggestions of what they could possibly do with what became of all this and Rhapsody had made sure she hadn't slithered back into the depths of her den and not come out for a few months.
What she really didn't want was more tension, which the femme knew was inevitable. It was in their nature to compete for her. Why couldn't Yamamori just either have no Alphens or multiples? It'd be so much easier on her. "Toorima, you know I'd..." The ebony femme glanced over at him. He had been having a difficult time as well, just as she had, he for obviously different reasons but it was all the same in one way or another. "If only there was a way to help..." She slowly sighed. But he already had helped her, sitting her and listening to her angst and offering up suggestions. "I think you already have.." she whispered silently, not explaining any further than that. It was enough.
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